Enhancing Communication In Marriage
|
In marriages, many arguments and hurt feelings can be traced back to communication problems. It's not unusual for spouses to stay in a continual state of frustration, feeling misunderstood and unappreciated.
Unexpressed feelings can pile up and poison the relationship. When you repress your anger, it will always come out later, usually after something minor has upset you.
You may find that it's difficult to have a complete conversation without you or your spouse leaving the room before the conflict is resolved. The emotional buttons that your spouse pushes in you can make you want to bolt and get away from your uncomfortable feelings and reactions.
Learning to communicate more effectively with your spouse requires that you be fully present and attentive. You have to be committed to really listening and hearing, not only with your ears but also with your heart. You want to eliminate any communication blocks that prevent you and your partner from growing in understanding and intimacy.
Communication blocks are anything that you do, verbally or non-verbally, to keep you from connecting deeply with another person. Some examples of communication blocks in marriage are:
* Rolling your eyes and looking resigned or exasperated when your spouse is talking;
* Sighing deeply and loudly when your spouse is sharing his/her viewpoint;
* Looking at your watch or a clock repeatedly;
* Not stopping what you're doing when your spouse is trying to have a serious talk with you;
* Not making eye contact and not giving your partner your undivided attention;
* Using the time when your spouse is talking to think about other things unrelated to the conversation;
* Tuning your spouse out because you've heard the same thing repeatedly and are convinced it's the same old speech;
* Becoming defensive and angry immediately instead of showing your partner the respect of hearing him/her out;
* Belittling your spouse, name calling, cursing, shaking or pointing a finger, or getting in his/ her face.
* Interrupting your partner before he/she is finished talking.
It has been said that for every minute you are angry with someone, you lose sixty seconds of happiness that you can never get back. It just makes good sense to do everything you can to preserve the good will and intimacy of your marriage when conflict, anger, hurt feelings, and disagreements occur.
If you truly love your partner, you will not want to rip him/her to shreds verbally, or to ignore or discount differing opinions and beliefs. You will want to do everything you can to insure that you have quality communication in your relationship and that you are communicating your caring, love, and respect to your spouse
Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "The most important thing in any relationship is not what you get but what you give." While you cannot control how someone else will react to your efforts, you can commit to doing all you can to create a safe environment where intimacy can flourish.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Nancy J. Wasson, Ph.D., is co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says "I don't love you anymore!" The e-book is available at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com , where you can also sign up for the free Keep Your Marriage Internet Magazine. Contact Nancy at Nancy@KeepYourMarriage.com.
|
|
|
Arizona Wedding Reception
The Arizona Inn is just the place that you are looking for if you seeking for neat and well-cared for lawns and trees combined with lush gardens and a serene view. Apart from that, this inn is also filled with fragrances of roses and oranges as well as eye-catching fountains. There is no doubt on the exquisiteness of the Arizona Inn, having won numerous hotel awards in addition to being a host to many of Arizona's best wedding receptions. In fact, its prestige extends to being named one of the top 50 small hotels in the US based on the Zagat survey. In this venue, you can definitely plan for a romantic wedding reception as their reception halls are uniquely designed with French doo...(related: Marriage Wedding)
Is Conflict Healthy In Marriage?
Today my three-year-old daughter told my husband that she wants to be married. When he asked her why, she replied, "Because you get to be nice to one another".Are you nice to your partner? Or do you find yourself involved in heated competition, endless cycles of discord, and/or tiresome critical thinking?According to Diane Sollee, founder of the Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE), "Every happy, successful couple has approximately ten areas of 'incompatibility' or disagreement that they will never resolve." In other words, it's ...(related: Marriage Wedding)
Wedding Flower Ideas
Your wedding flowers cover all button holes, all the bouquets, the decoration in the church, reception venue, and top table centerpiece if appropriate. So you can see it covers quite a large part of the decoration of the day.You may want the flowers to co-o...(related: Marriage Wedding)
Planning Your Wedding - How To Get Organized
You have purchased the latest bridal magazines from your local grocery store and there are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding gowns, rings and articles on weddings. Some give you a brief idea of what you need to do to plan your wedding, but you're still not sure how to begin the process.The key is to start organizing and planning earlier than later.You first need to create a system to keep all the details in one place. You may choose to use a binder with a tab for each category you will be using. Examples of categories are: Bakery, Ceremony, Catering, Florist, Music, Reception, Photography, Transportation. An accordion file is another choice, using the same catego...(related: Marriage Wedding)
A Call For International Marriage Laws
I recently watched a CNN programme which centred on "kidnapped daughters" (from multicultural marriages) who w...(related: Marriage Wedding)
Seven Ways To Survive A Remodel (and Save Your Marriage) Tips From Pisa Design, Inc
Remodels are tough on everyone. The house is out of order, the refrigerator is out of pudding, and the family wiener dog is out of sorts as he searches for his food dish. To help ease the stress of a remodel, we suggest you follow ...(related: Marriage Wedding)
Marriage Counseling: How To Reduce Hurt Feelings When You And Your Spouse Disagree
One of the biggest on-going problems for couples is how to reduce the hurt feelings that can result from arguments and disagreements. The fall-out from a no-holds barred "kill your opponent" verbal altercation can last for decades.I have worked wi...(related: Marriage Wedding)
A Look At Maui Wedding Cakes
Since Maui and Hawaii in general have been blessed with the most wonderful fruits and flowers, the best cakes on the island tend to take advantage of them. There are companies on the islands that have been creating designs and recipes for wedding cakes for over 50 years. Many have received worldwide acclaim. Several, in fact, have created wedding cakes for the rich and famous for weddings not even held in Hawaii.The cakes are produced to order and then flown to their fina...(related: Marriage Wedding)
site-map - Copyright © 2007 | Contact Webmaster | All Rights Reserved | Free Articles and Information | Marriage Wedding